Friday, October 31, 2008

Let This Image Fill Your Head Today


Happy Halloween, May you think of me and this image MANY times today. No "ifs", "ands" or..."butts".

Enjoy the Crack O'lantern!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Complaints Department - Road Edition Day: Fall Out - Part Deuce


Here's how the day started at Worlds of Fun in K.C. Saturday, nice ay? Well, the morning started great, I even had a decent breakfast that I brought along in the form of an Otis Spunkmeyer Chocolate Chocolate chip muffin(that's not a typo) check it out:

I even had a nice french vanilla cappuccino to boot, sugar high:CHECK. We opened the park at 11:00 and got to our first coaster, The Mamba. I could tell this was going to be a great day, how? Dig this, when we are just about to get on the ride, there's a view that may cause some people to be a bit alarmed. we saw next to the front car, cordless power tools...huh? See for yourself:

After they get everyone on board, the repair guy comes out from out of the shadows and begins to work on the front car. Me, I'm laughing my ass off at this point and asking the guy in this photo:

"Hey, are you union?" "This isn't your first day on the job is it?" A few people laughed, others actually looked concerned and actually requested that the man answer the questions. I managed to get a few photos off of the coaster WITHOUT LOSING MY CAMERA(Darius, that was just for you) Check these out:
Here's a view as we reach the top:

and here's a look at downtown K.C. as we hit said top of coaster:

After this ride, we sought out other coasters and none of those were in need of concern...at least that's from my view point. Perhaps this is a good time to mention that it's not a good idea to bring a camera with you to take pictures off of the roller coaster WHILE IT'S MOVING, right Darius? As a chronic bender of rules for the sake of your viewing pleasure, PLEASE, I am a professional, DO NOT do this on your own(obligation met). Anyway, while strolling through the park that day, I came across WATER RIDES STILL IN OPERATION. People, it's friggin' 40 degrees outside and they were running rides that you can get wet, DAMN! I'm crazy, but I ain't nuts. I didn't feel like catching pneumonia that day. Don't take my word for it, look:

I also managed to find what Jim over at Busplunge's future will be like:

I also found one for the longroofer(yes another hearse):

What could possibly top this day, what could I possibly do that could better than riding in a possibly malfunctioning coaster, dodging pneumonia or suffering the down swing of a sugar high? Well, how about this:


It's called Rip Cord and MAN IS THIS FREAKING AWESOME!!! I hadn't had a rush like this since my first stint in college with my test results coming back and hearing they were negative. At 180 feet tall and a swing of about 80 MPH, the only thing more I could ask for was for it to be higher and to swing me faster.

I did manage to get a decent restaurant visit in on this weekend sojourn, but in my weariness, I neglected to get a decent photo of the most awesomely affordable dessert at 54TH Street Bar & Grill. I WAS going to get ribs, but when the guy asked me what I wanted, it came out, "Chicken Strip Basket", DOH! I did manage to get my hands on that awesome dessert called "The Street’s House Chocolate Cake". Here's the best part, IT'S ONLY $1.99!!! This is the best 2 bucks you could EVER spend at a sit down dinner, period.

Sorry this took so long to get out, but a lot has been dumped on me lately and it couldn't be ignored. It seems as though I have blinked and a week has gone by, literally.

Friday, October 24, 2008

Complaints Department - Road Edition: Fall Out Part 1

First off, I'm still laughing my ass off on what happened just as we hit K.C., more on that later. The trip started off a bit behind schedule as we didn't get out of town until 4:30, but at least we missed rush hour traffic. The trip is a bit of a buzz kill as we are rollin' packing 3 chitlins in the back and their Nintendo DS's. It's all good because we're up front listening to various XM radio stations. We weren't pressed so we're slow ridin' up to K.C.

Just so you know, I believe how I have made my feelings known about people who drive slow and just hang in the left lane, not to mention that it is against the law. Well, I have backup from a Missouri state trooper that hauled ass passed us to snag some guy in an Acura, but in the way is some dipshit in a red Accord and even with the trooper on his ass, he still didn't get over. The trooper goes around him in the right lane and barrels down on that Acura. The trooper then IMMEDIATELY gets out of the car, walks right into the middle of the road and flags down that dumbass in the red Accord. HA!!! That was a treat for the ol' eyes there.

Around 7:00, we hit south K.C. The chitlins are now hungry and whining(didn't see that coming). The Day Tripper says to hit the first chain outfit we see. Now, this is the part that gets me to laughing my ass off. We pull into south K.C., if any of you know this area, then you know it's GHET-TO. I ain't sayin' nothin', it ain't bothering me. HOWEVER, in the infinite wisdom and foresight of the Day Tripper, she has chosen to wear her Jared Allen Jersey. Just one problem, it's the NEW Jared Allen jersey from...MINNESOTA! Yeah, she got some strange looks with those colors flyin'. The McD's we rolled into was smack dab in the middle of this hood and at this point, I'm just smiling. Everyone gets their food, I get my McRibs and the scarfing ensues. As we are eating, police cars are going by at a rate of 1 to every 5 minutes with the lights going and sirens blaring...ah, brings back memories. Day Tripper and husband with chitlins in tow are now wanting to leave for some reason. Just as we are chunking things in the garbage, some guy rolls in while still rolling a blunt, just licking it, putting the final touches on it. At this point we're leaving the place and I am about to come undone with laughter... I finally did as we leave the parking lot.

This to me is funny as hell. I'm already having fun and we didn't even hit the park yet, that'll be tomorrow.

STAY TUNED

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

COMING SOON: Complaint Department Manager - Road Edition: Fall Out!

Yes, I get another break! This time, instead of hittin' down south, I'll be heading to K.C. There, I will be partaking of the sights of Worlds of Fun Halloween Haunt. I'll be hittin' the rides and hittin' some top notch junk food. I love theme parks, almost as much as Darius. This will be much like the last time I did this over the summer. I hope to have some good pics of the sights and the food.

Stay Tuned

Monday, October 20, 2008

Blogger's Meeting And Live Election Blogging!

Blogger's Meeting (and Live Election Blogging)
Patton Alley Pub
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
7 p.m.

Bring your laptops, yourself and bring your ASS! You've been notified, clear your schedule.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

I Think I'm Going To Be Sick

BEFORE
AFTER...DAMN!!!

Brad Sciullo of Uniontown, Pa. took out this monstrosity of a burger in just under 5 hours! It would take me just under 5 days. And here I thought I was hot shit for killing a half gallon tub of Blue Bell Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough ice cream...just to watch it die. I am currently in training(yes, training) to take on the Vermonster in Branson's new Ben & Jerry's location. I have been known for being able to inhale food in vast quantities, but after seeing this....DAMN! I can only equate this with that of a guy asking his girlfriend "THAT" question. I'm not sure if I'll "measure up" to doing something even remotely like this in my life, DAMN!!!

I feel so small right now.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Pro-Abortion???

Look, I'm just going to make this quick and simple. I don't care who you are or where you stand, please address the issue in the correct form. It's not "pro-abortion" it's "pro-abortion...RIGHTS" I don't think you'll find that many people out there lurking in the bushes waiting to victimize a pregnant woman, just because they're "pro-abortion". If you did, that's a sick mother-fucker.

This is just a pet peeve of mine, kind of like the pronunciation rant some time ago.

Monday, October 13, 2008

That Ain't Right!


Time once again to talk amongst yourselves. Start a topic, any topic so long as it has pissed you off and would like others to know about it. I'll give it a bit of a nudge. How about "The Bailout"? Anyone wanna take a shot at it? No rules, the more inflammatory the better. If not, give it a pass and tell me what has pissed YOU off. Time to unload.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

NBC Spotrs, Please Dump Faith Hill


The NFL does not rock on NBC. Saying Faith Hill rocks is like saying Celine Dion is a Heavy Metal Queen. *shudder* At least when they used Pink, it gave it a trashy kind of feel, still not "rock", but trashy.

For those who are a bit confused right now, NBC Sunday Night Football has a theme song for the program that is set to the tune of "I Hate Myself For Loving You" by Joan Jett(the only REAL choice NBC should have made). Pink was the artist they used and Faith Hill picked it up last season and up to this point. If they're going to use a female rocker(provide Joan Jett gave it a pass), perhaps they could use Lita Ford. It would be a great way to jump start her career again. I'm not saying make it permanent, maybe a season or 2. Hell, I'd be willing to give Amy Lee from Evanescence a shot, you could pick either one of those 2 pretty cheap right now I'd imagine.

Please NBC, not everybody watching Sunday Night Football at home is a post-modern redneck that is easily appeased. I fail to see the link between Faith Hill and football. Enlighten me.

Friday, October 10, 2008

Ladies And Gentlemen, I Give You Sgt. Leo Lewis


Submitted to me by my good friend Fred Lewis, this is not a complaint, but rather a tribute to a 39 year career cop from St. Louis. Fred's uncle, Sgt. Leo Lewis after 39 years on the force is now retired. He won't be sitting at home though, instead he will pursue a passion for writing. He already has a self-published novel to his credit called, "The Cop and the Preacher." This came out in 1979 which is about a white cop, having been raised by a black preacher.

Sgt. Leo Lewis came to St. Louis by way of Texarkana, Arkansas. I know quite enough about T-town, trust me when I say that ESPECIALLY from back in 60's, it wasn't friendly at all to black citizens. He got tired of spending 2 years picking cotton in Texarkana and decided that he needed to find opportunity elsewhere and he did by joining the Army. After a brief stint there, he found his way to St. Louis and joined the police academy. He was part of the graduating class of 1969 and from there, stayed as one of the city of St. Louis' finest.

This is a man who came from a family of 11, yes 11! To come from such humble beginnings and to make his mark in life as a Sargent in the St. Louis Police Force, I call that a great American success story. THIS is what America is about, THIS is the REAL America. Too much we hear about people taking shortcuts to achieve their gains and they say they are a success. No, you just made money where as THIS MAN made an impact. Sgt. Leo Lewis, you've earned your retirement and you have the respect of this blogger. That book again is,"The Cop and the Preacher" by Leo Lewis, the premise alone promises some very insightful reading.

Please Pronounce Words Correctly

I'm not originally from the south and part of what aggravates me by being a transplant is the absolute butchering of commonly used words. Today, I got to hear "Missouri" pronounced mizz-ur-uh. Look, for those of you that do this, I can't tell you how wrong and annoying it is. It's not cute, it's not clever, it's just damn silly, but most importantly, it's annoying! It's not Missour-uh, It's not Cinncinat-uh, not Mississipp-uh, you don't vacation in Hawai-uh, or Miam-uh, or even Tahit-uh, and we didn't learn more about peace from Ghand-uh. What's worse is that I've heard the town Nixa pronounced, "Nixy". Yeah, Nixy, Mizzuruh, real cute. I hear this shit from people who are quick to correct me when I take it upon myself to pronounce the town Lebanon, Missouri as, "Leban-NON" instead of "Leba-NUN"(allegedly the correct way) as I also say Spokane, Missouri as "Spo-CAN" instead of, "Spo-CANE". I give up. Perhaps I should move to MexEEco.

I am the Complaints Department Manager and I approve this correctly pronounced message.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Is It Too Damn Much To Ask For A Wave???


You know the drill, you see the signal, you hold back and give some space, you motion to come over, they do and then they wave to show their appreciation. THIS woman NEEDED to get over or she was going to start a bit of a traffic jam on the street. So, I saw her signal, I held back and gave her room, I stuck my hand OUT the window to motion her over, she moved over...WAIT! AH, HELL NO!!! You know, I didn't HAVE to let her in, but I did. People were bringin' it from behind us and there's no tellin' how long she may have sat there and risked a rear ender accident, which I see almost every damn time I go to Springfield. Know this, that this was the second time this happened to me today. I'm seeing a growing trend of traffic entitlement lately, while this only happened to me twice today, it does happen a lot on other days and today, it just happened to rub me the wrong way.

For those of you(like me) who go out of there way to make sure the wave is seen beyond a shadow of a doubt, I thank you and please keep doing it, maybe, just maybe these dip shits MIGHT get the hint. It doesn't take THAT much effort to be a courteous driver.

If anyone sees this woman out there, let her know that she wasn't "entitled" to the spot in front of me. Also, waving is a good thing and it doesn't cost anything but a very small amount of time and minimal effort. Now to those of you who didn't know or didn't "understand the concept", you better ask somebody.

I'm the Complaints Department Manager and I approve this message.

Saturday, October 4, 2008

...And 40 Years Ago, Something Else Happened


October 4, 1968, The Day Tripper(my sister) was born. Wait a minute...DAMN...40 YEARS??? HOLY SHIT!!! Well, at least it's not me or at least not yet. She is about to embark upon the world anew as a Massage Therapist. Unfortunately, it is because of that, that she will not be getting the day off. Everyone, please stop by The Day Tripper and remind indulge her with a happy birthday. For those of you who have deep pockets, she did make mention of wanting the new Chevy Camaro and in true good taste, as her wonderfully fantastic brother, would like it in yellow:

My pockets have holes, so this is the best I could do. I tried to sneak it in on the bail out package, but I was bumped aside by some assholes needing cash to make wooden arrows in the Pacific NorthWest. But look on the bright side sis, if you buy your own, you'll appreciate it that much more when your working out the kinks on a fat bastard with more hair on his back than a Grizzly bear. Oh, and tell your husband I'm not talking about him.

Happy Birthday Sis!!!

Thursday, October 2, 2008

5 Years Ago Today, THIS Happened:

Tiger Attack
Perhaps it was a hate crime, perhaps not. We'll never know.

Racists... And the Rest Of Those Haters

A lot is being said nowadays about race in a certain field of the news. Skygirl over at Corner of the Sky has a really nice and eloquent way of putting things in to perspective(there's also a link on hers that leads to another person's vulgar take, he's an asshole). There are those of you who are out there that not only have hateful speech that makes it outside of your mouth, but there are those who are a little less brazen and keep it to themselves. Let me tell you people something, if you are one of those people ask yourself something. If I'm so right about my judgement, why is it that I haven't been able to say my feelings aloud? I'll tell you why, it's called FEAR. Fear of either getting your ass beat down or fear that you might have to face the fact that you are a racist and might have to call in to question your whole ideology, quite possibly including the teachings of your friends and/or family. Doesn't matter how you justify it or reason with it in discussion, hate is hate and fear is fear. I just call it as I see it. Some of you fuckers just don't "get it".

The absolute same thing can be said about the gay community. There seems to be a huge sense of homophobia out there that...well, I find...amusing, actually. I have actually heard the argument that gay people are, " a threat to my marriage". WHAT? Uh, if gay people break up your marriage, YOU MARRIED A GAY PERSON! Yes, I find that amusing. I do find that people are extremely opposed to gay marriage/unions. I'm so sick of the, "It's a sin" thing that it makes me want to hurl. What the hell do you people care, it's not you that is involved. MIND YOUR OWN DAMN BUSINESS!!! These same people judge these gay people th-...wait a minute, isn't judging people a sin? How many of you people out there that are SO opposed to the gay community ACTUALLY KNOW someone who is gay?

*Full disclosure: As a younger misguided individual, I made A LOT of harsh words and thoughts very vocal. I stand(or this case right now sit) before you now ashamed of my behavior. I WAS WRONG, PERIOD! I can find you all the excuses in the world to justify my actions, but none of them would be an actual answer, just a damn excuse. So what's yours?

I have come to know people who are openly gay throughout my life and I can honestly say they actually are good people, they're just like the rest of us, they just have better taste.(okay, I don't care who you are, that's just damn funny)If those of you just took the time to get to know someone who is actually gay, you might be surprised at how "being gay" doesn't really make a damn bit of difference on down the road. There's that fear again, calling your so-called values in to question again. Here's another thought, how many of you out there, who are so against the gay community, are so positively sure that some of their friends and/or family AREN'T gay? Step back and think about that for a while. Let the fear go, you'll feel better.

RECOGNIZE!

EDIT: In my haste to put this out this morning I COMPLETELY forgot that Kim has a great video representation of what we are all getting at...and Aerosmith(post drug use).