Monday, July 7, 2008
Paula Deen Is Also an Axis of Evil
Hey ya'lllllll, today were gonna deep fry mac and cheese and freebase some pork fat! From my kitchen, to yeeeerrrrrrzzzzzzzz.
Take 1 large Myocardial Infarction, saute with arteriosclerosis, lightly fold in a few random thrombosis then serve it up with a stroke and a side order of type 2 Diabetes and you have Paula Deen. I finally get to watch Food Network again after avoiding it for over a year due to the temptation to over indulge and low and behold, I found out why that was a good call on my part. I forgot that this is the same person who brought us Krispy Kreme Bread Pudding. Anytime you have a dish that starts out with 2 dozen Krispy Kreme doughnuts(again, this is just ONE of the ingredients), you've got some serious issues. Just that dish alone qualifies her as another axis of evil. But wait...there's more! If I have to hear that evil witch cackle ONE more time, I may dump a bucket of water on the witch just to watch her melt. I also have to hear that over played token southern accent that to me is almost a "nails on the chalkboard" thing as the cackle. Lots of people think she's just precious, I think she's precocious...to an obesity program. How can you suck down that much fat and cholesterol and still be walking around? If she ever cut herself, I'm convinced that brown gravy will come out. It pushes my point further along that she's in league with Lucifer. By the way, does anyone else think she looks like Hillary Clinton if Hillary packed on 50 lbs and 20 more years of a cholesterol laden lifestyle?
I actually like Food Network, afterall, there is a lot of really good information floating around some of the time slots, but there are problems here and there that could easily be fixed. I may ponder this further and make a few observations known soon, I just don't know if it's worthy of being brought up or not. The observations, of course, are certain hosts of some of these shows. Again, I may point them out and take a few shots, but I don't know if it's worth me doing or not. I will say, Paula Deen is by far, the main complaint I have with them right now. I will say that there is a host on Food Network that is a blogger and if that person ever saw this and wondered if they may make the pot shot list, rest easy, you are actually a bright spot.