![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-sHaI0Zk3zlwopzVrCZ-NNUMNeFiEBx8P7-DyXuKFjahyphenhyphenIjZv7uD0wP0ZkxcVsYZMViN6WZOF_YZsONcy1tDdDun3SoBoMFsE4hxS32vqJ5_sg8CKPx7A7j4yOe5XJ2Wt0bL2ExN6fTEQ/s400/2011-03-11+11.46.40.jpg)
Just last week, I made a trip to Schaumburg, Il. I have to admit, it's a great place to visit/stay while in Chicagoland. One thing they have is AWESOME fucking food! So much so, that there's too much for me to list and I am now too fat to reach my keyboard over my now looming gut...but it was worth it.
More importantly, I need to direct everyone's attention to a culinary terrorist joint I stopped at along the way in Springfield, Il. called The Coney Island Restaurant. What these home-grown gastro-terrorists have created was nothing short of a killer...a proverbial cardiac arrest on a plate called "The Horseshoe".
What is it? Well, you actually get your choice of meats to put on this thing, but I chose well and went with the burger. What it is, is this: They start out with 2 pieces of Texas toast, slap down 2 patties of meat(burger), then cover it with a mound of fries...but wait, it gets better! After all that is mounded on to your plate, they cover it with cheese sauce! The end result looks like this:
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXdZ8b1ijp3UPRw-XjSRWWGsHClTtiw7CN814TOJeT1izZQy5TqzqoDV5X5gz8NPSz68O10HaBwhSIIInrWMY0u0qr-vpkVqEm3YtRL2quvF69gm8vVEKzRCHmTYOCEYotfCe4JGjQsnoz/s400/2011-03-11+11.24.35.jpg)
Me, not wanting to let a culinary time bomb to go off, sacrificed myself, my cholesterol count and temporary use of fitting clothes so that I may reduce this cholesterol bomb to this:
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCIZ8WUBdvit7D4Os5wEhEM41eS4XK1VE8PU90o_pcvTKjmPn4bWdoTxdoCT4deO1g4y_o3LKfBblqgYfT2lqqOLGtBr0xzw_VSzTdw-JNY3R2AC2etVdysjES2YzjIWqGOyMCjVSRNssa/s400/2011-03-11+11.36.23.jpg)
I don't think of myself as a hero, but if I can save someone else from being put in the path of something like this, I will gladly forfeit my health and safety so that you and everyone else can rest easy...and in proper fitting clothes.
I am the Complaint Department Manager and I now see why Illinois is abbreviated as "Ill".